Tuesday, November 30, 2010

My dreams coming true...(taken from my note on Facebook)

Almost 7 years ago, I believe God called me to Go. He promised to send me. I was expecting to go on a mission trip the following summer, but that never happened. Soon after, I heard our women's pastor talk about her trip to Africa, and at that moment I knew I was supposed to go to Africa. At the time, I dreaded that idea, because it seems like 'everyone' goes to Africa. As time went by, I began to let that promise fade. It wasn't until about two years ago that God reestablished that dream in my life. I am called by the God of the universe to go to Africa and to work with orphans, and to someday build a n orphanage. Once this dream was awakened within my heart, I wanted to be on the next flight to Africa, believe me, I tried to find opportunity to go to Africa, but it didn't ever get off the ground.

About a week or two ago, an opportunity came out of nowhere. I had been praying for months that I would have an opportunity to go on a mission trip in the next year. I was talking with a friend of mine, who works with Global Expeditions (mission organization with Teen Mania Ministries, where I was an intern), she is actually planning an adult trip to Ethiopia this spring, which focuses on ministering to orphans, and former prostitutes, she told me that she thought it was the perfect trip for me. I have filled out my application and been accepted to go on this trip. This is a 11 day trip, to Africa, for only $2889. The other trips they do to Africa cost about $4000.

"For whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved.
How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed?
How will they believe in Him whom they have not heard?
And how will they hear without a preacher?
How will they preach unless they are sent?
Just as it is written,
Romans 10:13-15 NASB

The above verse, was given to me about 3 years ago. Now, as you all know, my feet are not what one would typically consider beautiful due to there toe-less nature. However, the Word states, beautiful are the feet of those who bring good things! I can't tell you how life changing this verse has been, or how many times others have prayed it over my life or used it to encourage me.

I don't mean to get all emotional, but you guys, I am sitting here crying tears of joy. This is my DREAM, this is what I am MADE for. And God is faithful, He is delivering on His promise. I am confident that God is going to provide the money, though I don't know how, and I don't know when.

This note is a call to prayer, pray for me, pray for Ethiopia, pray that God would lay it on people's heart to fund this mission trip. Pray that God would break my heart for what breaks His, and that above all else, the gospel would be preached, and we would see many come into the Kingdom.

~Still standing on His Promises~

PS If you would like to keep updated on this process, please add yourself to my facebook group Change for Change in Ethiopia and/or attend my event to save your pennies (and other change) to send me to Africa.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Seasons are changing...

Many of us are probably experiencing, the seasons are changing from fall to winter.
As in the natural, I feel the season of my spiritual life changing as well.

I am not exactly sure what season I am entering into, nor do I know when I will fully enter into this new season. The season I am currently in is one of brokenness, vulnerability, and humbleness. 

So often I find myself trying to measure up to my expectations of who I should be or what I should do, and fall into legalism. Recently I have been shoving my emotions, feelings, and struggles not only under the rug, but under the floor boards, deep into the earth, through many trapped and locked doors. I often tell myself, if I can't feel it then it's all ok. However, this is not the case. By burying my emotions, struggles, and other things, I only bury myself, becoming a shell of a person. I build up walls, I lie about how I am feeling because I am afraid of being weak.

But I am working through this, by walking in grace that Christ freely offers. As to what the future holds, I am uncertain. 

Right now I am planning on going on a mission trip to Ethiopia to work with orphans, widows, and former prostitutes. This is my DREAM mission trip. I have to raise about $3000 by March/April, the trip is mid May. If you could be praying for me as I get ready for this adventure, I would appreciate it. IF you have questions, please feel free to ask.

~Set Apart~

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

What am I even doing?

Here I am, in my living room at 12:13 AM, all alone. Left with my thoughts, the true condition of my heart exposed. No where to run. No where to hide.

I just took my quiz 6 minutes before the deadline. I have so much homework due this week it's crazy, and very little time to accomplish it. That has been the story of my life for the last 4-6 weeks.

I sit here asking myself, "What am I even doing here?" What can I cut back on to get more time. The truth is I can't. I am prioritizing, which sometimes means ministry or relationships over school. Which is what happened tonight, I had bible study and fellowship after work. Which was great, I am involved in youth ministry, which I love. I have two jobs, which I also love. 

I am reminded of our bible study tonight, we talked about being bought with a price, that we are not our own but God's. That being a follower of Christ isn't easy, and requires sacrifice and time, which is painful and not easy.

Is that my season Lord? Time sacrificing? 

I am so weary, I need You.
I am tired of being an adult,
I do not want to worry about the bills,
the grades, the lack of money, lack of sleep,
lack of  faith, lack of everything.
Father, my soul longs for You.
I want to be wrapped in Your arms,
I want Your comfort, hold me.
Restore my soul
Restore my spirit,
Restore my hope Jesus.

~Set Apart for Him~